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Every-woman: For those in abusive relationships, whether man or woman

Every-woman: For those in abusive relationships, whether man or woman

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For those in abusive relationships, whether you are a man or a woman. Abuse on any level is not ok. Someone constantly blaming you, never letting you feel loved, someone who calls you names, makes you feel inferior on a constant basis, psychologically damages you, makes you feel insane, makes you feel afraid, doesn’t show you basic respect and affection, who holds back money for basics, ignores you for days on end, all of this is abuse. Don’t, for one second let them convince you that you deserve it.

 

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And it is never ever ever ok for someone to hit you or hurt you physically. Never lie to yourself, that you somehow deserved it. You did not.


You need to ask yourself, why do you keep tolerating this abuse ? You need to know your worth, fix your self -esteem, pick up your stuff and move. I don’t mean leave your relationships at the slightest inconvenience, but if you’ve worked at it and you’re feeling drained, negative, hurt and crazy all the time, you need leave for your own sanity.

 

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Sometimes we are drawn to such abuse because of childhood relationships and parental interaction. In homes that lacked love or were abusive, we tend to carry out these patterns into adulthood. Therapy helps with this and with self-esteem issues. Don’t let this pathetic society make you feel for one second that therapy is only for crazy people.

 

 

Therapy is healing for the mind and self-care as you would care for the body. Sort out these core issues if you can. The problem is, often these root issues make you feel unworthy of better treatment, hence you attract and accept abuse. You do deserve better. We accept the love we think we deserve.

 

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Many a time, when you ask someone, why do you stay ? They say because I love him/her. You love someone that hurts you ? Did you know abuse is addictive ? Also, you’re so used to that person ignoring you or not treating you well, that when they actually treat you well, you have that feel good rush.

 

Hence, you take all the lows, in anticipation of the highs, when they decide to be a little bit nice to you.
You don’t love them and it’s not your fault. These are things you’ve got yourself believing.

-Seek help

-Read.

-Figure out what’s going on and stop blaming yourself. Suicide is not the answer. There are many people who need you and love you. You do have purpose. Don’t dim your ability and sunshine because some toxic people told you so. We need you.

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